14^TH Sunday in Ordinary Time - HUMILITY, GENTILITY, CIVILITY

A Home Run, All Around

Here is the best baseball story of the year:This spring, Western Oregon State played Central Washington University in women’s softball for the conference championship. An NCAA playoff spot was on the line. With two on, Western Oregon’s Sara Tucholsky hit a home run clearing the center field fence. It was her first home run ever. A part-time starter in the outfield, Sara, in her final year, had only three hits in 34 at-bats all season. But as she circled the bases, Sara fell and hurt her knee. She lay crumpled in the dirt a few feet from first base and a long way from home plate. Her teammates ran to help her but their coaches stopped them: According to the rules, if any teammate ran on to the field, Sara would be called out. The umpires said that if Sara could make it back to first base, a pinch runner could be substituted — but Sara’s home run would be scored a single. Any assistance from coaches or trainers while Sara was an active runner would result in an out.

While Western Oregon was deciding its next move, the first baseman for Central Washington asked the umpire if she and her teammates could help. The umpire knew of no rule against the opposing team helping the player - so two Central Washington players put their arms under Sara’s legs and took her arms around their shoulders and then carried her around the base paths, stopping to let Sara touch each base. Central Washington’s compassion cost them. They lost the game 4 - 2 and the playoff berth. But that didn’t seem to faze the team. As one of their players said: “In the end, it’s not about winning and losing so much. It was about this girl. She’s a senior; it’s her last year. She hit it over the fence and she deserved a home run. It was the right thing to do.”

How to Win off the Diamond

There is a story that really shows how sportsmanship is supposed to be at the heart of all sport - contrary to the “win at all cost” mentality that seems to pervade so many athletic contests. It also beautifully illustrates what Jesus says in Matthew’s Gospel: “Learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart.” That is a lesson we need to learn and re-learn. Because the “win at all cost” philosophy is not restricted to the rink or the baseball diamond. It seems like humility and gentleness are not highly prized values; they don’t make a lot of sense to many people today.

Strength in Gentleness

Take gentleness. There is a belief that if you want to get on in life, you have to be hard. Otherwise, people will walk all over you. We tend to equate gentleness with being timid, passive or weak. Gentleness, however, is not a form of weakness but of strength. It takes a strong, self-confident person to be gentle. Think of the gentleness required in the hands of a mother or a surgeon. Henri Nouwen once said that “a gentle person treads lightly, listens carefully, looks tenderly and touches with reverence.” A gentle person knows that healing and growth come through nurturing, not forcing.

Humble, Not Humiliated

As for humility, it seems to be even less regarded than gentleness. In a competitive world, we’re told that we have to project ourselves if we’re going to go places. We have to be self-promoters. Humility is also seen as a form of weakness. But again, it takes a strong person to be truly humble. Because humility doesn’t mean self-depreciation. Rather, it’s the grateful recognition of our goodness, but acknowledging that this goodness is a gift from God.

Learn from Him

When Jesus says “Learn from me” how to be gentle and humble in heart he is offering himself as the supreme model. Jesus was by no means weak. He could speak and act defiantly when the occasion called for it, whether with the Pharisees or the money changers in the temple. But the Gospels show time and again that his approach was the soft-sell - it was gentle. He didn’t force himself on people, he did not try to impose or control. His was the way of invitation, persuasion and self-giving. And in the end, who has ever made more impact on the world around him?

We Have Met the Bully and He is Us

Recently I asked an educator about the recent focus on bullying in the schools. I wondered if kids are really bullying more than in the past and if so, why? Her response was interesting. It amounted to - what do you expect, when they see so many adults who are bullies? I think she was on to something: whether it’s rude treatment of store clerks and waiters, the colorful gestures that motorists give each other in traffic, or some of the comments that are hurled from the stands in rinks, gymnasiums and parks. Even if it’s only a vocal, ill-mannered minority, still it seems like some of the civility has gone out of society. No wonder that young people pick up on it.

The Remedy

We shouldn’t lose heart though, because there is a Christian prescription for this social malady. It is to learn from Jesus the way that leads to peace. By imitating his gentleness and humility, we find our best selves and bring out the best in others. By rejecting the “win at all cost” ethos, we actually earn something of far greater value - rest for our souls - or if you prefer, the peace that comes from God.

Father Dan Miehm

July 6, 2008